Of Money and Why You’re Afraid to Ask for More

You managed to avoid it the whole meeting. You were confident, well-informed, articulate. The client seems impressed and is willing to do business with you.  All that’s left to do is discuss the money…



 What happened???


One way of understanding a fear is by rationalizing it. Picking it up with your bare hands, turning it over in the light and inspecting it with a magnifying glass while doing your best Sherlock Holmes/ Sheldon Cooper impression.

First of all:

In whatever-thousand B.C, money was created to represent value that can exchanged for goods and services, making it possible for people to form complex networks and markets all over the world. Today, it represents much more than commercial value in the eyes of society. Hard work. Intelligence. Skill. Education. Even God’s blessings somehow seem to manifest as money. All these extra meanings we’ve attached to that ‘piece of paper’ is what makes it such a personal and sensitive subject, placed in the same filing cabinet as dirty laundry or ‘what I did last night’ topics.

If we’re this squeamish about discussing money (with actual numbers attached), you can imagine how tangled up it gets when discussing cost, budgets, fees and salaries in our business and careers. Do you want to be a starving artist?? UM, NO.


(holds the stone closer to the light)


The problem is not that we don’t want money…it’s that we’re mortally afraid to ask for the amount we want because we feel like we don’t deserve it.

How much are you actually worth? Exactly how much of that paper do you deserve? If someone up there could just reach down and stick a price tag on you, that would be great. Unfortunately, that’s never going to happen.

 Even if they do, that’s their subjective opinion. The only person who can decide how much value you bring to the table is you. So instead of looking down on yourself, how about you work out the shillings and cents of your equation? It is a beast that must be tackled, sooner rather than later. The sooner you can figure out your price tag and set it down in stone tablets Moses-style, the better off your business will be.

Step One: Figure Out Your Value.

Step Two: Put A Number On It (Several Numbers For Diverse Offerings).

Step Three: Set It In Stone.

Then for the love of Moses, open your mouth and ask for it. Don’t let that first client meeting end without nailing down a budget. Say it confidently to the HR doing the hiring process. Understand the logic behind your price points enough to explain it confidently when asked. You can also decide not to explain yourself. It’s your choice. It’s your value. And at the end of the transaction, it’ll be your money.

Don’t short change yourself.



P.S- I’m not a money expert nor am I immune to anything discussed here. This is a solid attempt of the blind leading the blind.


  1. This is the truth that stares most people in the face! Being more confident about your own selfworth is the key to judging yourself without a second though. Very insightful stuff ryt here!